The Difference Attitude Can Make

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The Difference Attitude Can Make

Postby grizzlybluebird on Thu Feb 23, 2017 8:06 am

in the QB thread at the Roost I had posted this long comment but thought it would be better to start a new topic here and avoid the long comments over there. The discussion has been going on about how a winning culture or attitude can make all the difference and certainly I agree. Here is my non-football illustration from personal experience, that I am not proud of, but share for your consideration:


Attitude can make outcomes different - Bully Grizz Gets What He Deserves

by the time i was 18, i had moved 18 times. i attended a different high school in a different state each year from 10th thru 12th grade.

in one small neighborhood that i lived in a few years, which was long for me, somehow i ended up being somewhat of the neighborhood bully. i was among the younger kids in that little neighborhood but my older brother was king dog of them all and no wonder because he would go on to fight in special forces for our country, in Vietnam. bravest, toughest and most fearless man i ever knew. but being in the youngest group somehow i became dominant and to the point where i was becoming a small time bully over kids that were several years older then me. i think it was because some of them had soft parents and they impacted their kids to be soft so its not like i was getting an upper hand on older kids that had normal self esteem or whatever - they were sissies (or so i thought)

one day i was across the street bullying the older brother of a family in his own yard, which was almost a daily thing. im not proud of it at all but this is historical and no denying the truth. i was pushing the bigger and older kid around as usual and finally when he was pushed enough he began to defend himself. i took him down like he was nothing, as i did every other day and fists were flying. it was another domination by bully grizz and i saw the finish line approaching and was about to get off the kid and go home. but that is when one of the oldest kids in the neighborhood happened to walk by and seeing me on top of jerry, the older kid stopped, leaned over and said "jerry, why are you letting grizz beat you up? he's younger than you and smaller than you. get up and punch him in the face" i was sitting on jerry's chest with my knees on both of his biceps, punching his face left and right until that moment. when the older kid had said that, i saw a look come into jerry's eyes, no kidding. jerry threw me off to the side, got up and as soon as i stood, he punched me straight in the eye and i saw stars. i think he got me a couple more times before i ran home balling like a baby.

i was surprised for two reasons - first the older kid is the same one that use to actually pay me to beat sissy jerry up and even to keep his dog out of jerry's yard. he didnt like him and being older it was not appropriate for him to do it - so he put me up to it those few years and i dominated that kid. the 2nd reason for my surprise was until that moment when i saw a new look come into jerry's eyes, he had always been weak and easy to beat even though he was bigger and older than me but all of a sudden he wasnt weaker than me anymore. he just threw me like i was nothing, suddenly, out of nowhere and assumed his rightful place as a bigger, older and stronger kid. he'd had enough. i literally saw his attitude change in that moment - he realized all of a sudden that he did not need to let me beat on him at all. i had a black eye, but most of all, my feelings were hurt - ha ha - good for jerry and i deserved it.

that was the difference attitude can make.
but notice - the change happened because of one outside influence in a single moment.
without that, i would probably have beaten jerry up all the time as had been standard and he would have grown up a defeated, dominated kid.
yeah coaching can make a huge difference.

from that day on, jerry took his fair place in the pecking order of that neighborhood and one humbled grizz never picked on him again but instead, respected him. i run into jerry now and then to this day and its always great to see him. i brought this fight up to him a few years ago, heck it happened 45 years prior and jerry was the same humble but confident guy i saw in his eyes back then - his response was only that he was sorry that he punched me that day. wow... what a humble and good hearted person. i deserved it and much more but not in his mind. that is what leaders can do - they can treat people below them with respect and dignity even when they do not deserve it. but attitude can set people up to lose one day and then change everything the very next. i know it for a fact. it happened to me and im hoping it is getting ready to happen for the Hens. its their turn now - Hens baby!
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Re: The Difference Attitude Can Make

Postby dchen on Thu Feb 23, 2017 5:35 pm

Story reminds me of a scene in a Sean Connery movie (forget the name) where he goes to jail to keep his son and grandson (Dustin Hoffman and Matthew Broderick) from having to serve time. First thing he does in the transport van is to beat the crap out of one of the new inmates. There was a provocation but the real purpose of the beat down was to send a message not to mess with him.
Different circumstances of course but as a young guy in a new neighborhood you may have been doing the same so don't be too hard on your young self. From Jerry's point of view, he reminded my of a heavyweight wrestler in my Newark (NJ) high school who always took a beat down from the same wrestler at another school. Finally fed up, in his last shot he beat the crap out of the kid.
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Re: The Difference Attitude Can Make

Postby grizzlybluebird on Fri Feb 24, 2017 8:42 am

dchen wrote:Story reminds me of a scene in a Sean Connery movie (forget the name) where he goes to jail to keep his son and grandson (Dustin Hoffman and Matthew Broderick) from having to serve time. First thing he does in the transport van is to beat the crap out of one of the new inmates. There was a provocation but the real purpose of the beat down was to send a message not to mess with him.
Different circumstances of course but as a young guy in a new neighborhood you may have been doing the same so don't be too hard on your young self. From Jerry's point of view, he reminded my of a heavyweight wrestler in my Newark (NJ) high school who always took a beat down from the same wrestler at another school. Finally fed up, in his last shot he beat the crap out of the kid.


thx brother - enjoyed your thoughts and story about the wrestler. i have plenty of shameful moments growing up, looking back but hope i am a better man today. i thought it a good illustration of how dramatic the change from attitude can be. im thinking this is going to be a very exciting year for the Hens - these young men have worked hard and i can't wait to see them rewarded for that and their loyalty. we have the Richmond rivalry with angered Spider fans to look forward to, we have plenty of paybacks to look forward to. Hens baby!
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